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I have adopted a cat. Pictures will follow once they come out of hiding. 
Cat continues to hide, but actually used the litterbox last night! Yay!
Cat update: they are eating and pooping and exploring when no one is around. Also, they actually hissed at me when I found them in one of their hiding spots, as opposed to remaining silent. Progress?
OMG the cat just poked their head into my room! And then I got excited and said "hi!" and then they ran away...
I totally saw/heard the cat exploring my room some more while I was drifting in and out of sleep last night
@squinky "Go find your own hiding spot."
State of the cat: still hiding. Which is only fair, really: I basically uprooted them from the foster home in which they were only just starting to get comfy and put them in an unfamiliar place with weird new smells. Humans are assholes, indeed.