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Look at me out here not looking like trash tonight :blobuwu: (selfie; eye contact)

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Me: "Yo! I was reading up on $tech last weekend, we can totally use it in the codebase and it'll be sweet"

Everyone: *crickets*

*months later*

Cunt Exec: So what's this i hear about $tech?

Buddy (white guy #1): Yeah you should talk to Soma about it, i think he knows the most about it out of all of us.

Cunt Exec: *looks at me* ... white guy #2, can you look into this?

Me: :smb3_sun: :smb3_sun: :smb3_sun: :smb3_sun: :smb3_sun: :smb3_sun:

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Hey folx! It's time!

My name is Soma, your friendly black neighborhood demiman. They/them pronouns, but he/him is no biggie. Im a cyclist, a front-end developer, an ancom, and just an all-around pain in the ass to white people everywhere (well, most anyway).

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Hi new followers! 

full disclosure: love Superchunk. Never heard Supertramp's stuff.

I get the bands Supertramp and Superchunk mixed up *a lot*.

Which is gonna get me into some awesome situations, I imagine

I wanna piss off *ALL* of white America, not just some of it.

Look, I hate capitalism as much as the next queer leftist, but i wanna be a rich, intelligent, sexy, and incredibly modest black man just to piss off America

The extraordinary thing to *me* is how Doug Walker surrounds himself with the unfunniest black people in the country


holy shit i forgot how useful float is in css :O

"Dude, remember when we tricked *every white person over 50* into thinking we ate fucking laundry detergent? πŸ˜‚"

Truly: epic.

What if the was just a social experiment to prove that boomers will believe anything as long as it:
A) shames millennial and
B) helps their favorite daytime TV personality tell shitty jokes

SubwayTooter is much quicker at getting the notifications to my phone.

On Tusky it takes a little while for them to come in. And sometimes it feels like they 'stack'; if i had a bunch come in since the last time i loaded Tusky, i get bombarded with notification chimes (which, as an inadvertent plus, makes me seem hella popular to the uninitiated πŸ˜›)

Now i can *securely* close these hot fries instead of just collapsing the bag in on itself and risking some falling out

I'm never buying shea butter from a white person ever again.

Last time, it was just a tub of corn starch mixed with water and mayonnaise.

Goddamn, wish dot com.

This is the price i pay for wanting a bed-based setup πŸ˜‚

In a way it makes me check my own privilege; it may have been the 90s but not everyone had a computer and stable internet. Sometimes i forget about that

I'm at a point where im flabbergasted when people my age say they werent into Geocities

Cranberry Red Bull was the proto 'Winter Edition'

You arent a real gamer unless your setup resembles the outside of a mobile phone accessory store

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