Genie: You have ONE WISH.
Me: Alright, I have one, but it's very detailed.
Genie: As long as it is only one wish, you're allowed to spend as much time as you want detailing it.
Me: Alright, here we go. *Grabs notebook and takes a deep breath* The key words MUST, MUST NOT, REQUIRED, SHALL, SHALL NOT, SHOULD, SHOULD NOT, RECOMMENDED, MAY, and OPTIONAL are to be interpreted as described in [RFC2119].
Genie: Wait, is that...?
Me: *Flips notebook* Chapter 1. Preamble.
@rick_777
Genie: You have ONE WISH.
Me: I wish for ƻŁMź&.☌♘♶ü_1⚀·♢hĞòv☋ðR★ï♷×ĀWµl
*The genie vanishes, and an enormous scroll of paper the size of a house appears in his place, with a thundering crash as it destroys the surrounding terrain.*
*I begin reading the scroll*
"SEGMENTATION FAULT, CORE DUMPED."
@bespectacled_fuzz @rick_777 Reminds me of the novel Wizard's Bane, where magic *isn't* Do What I Mean. I remember it as not being all that great a book, but a very amusing premise.
Spoilers for Wizard's Bane
Spoilers for Wizard's Bane
@varx @bespectacled_fuzz @rick_777 Genie: You have ONLY ONE wish.
Me: I'd like one wish please.
Genie: Well yes, I told you. ONE wish.
Me: I'd like 4294967297 wishes.
Genie: Yes, ONE. Now get to the point.
Me: I want a cucumber sandwich.
*Genie pulls a sandwich out of thin air*
Me: Ice cream?
*Genie makes it so*
Me: How about a car?
*A fancy car appears*
[4294967294 wishes later…]
Me: For the next person, I want your wish counter to be 1 bit only.
@daniel_bohrer @varx @bespectacled_fuzz @rick_777 I didn't get that one ... I was about to write until I got it. ^^
But then again I don't think that wouldt work. ^^
@betalars @varx @bespectacled_fuzz @rick_777 No, it wouldn't work, there are no genies in real life.
@rick_777 This is how I always imagine dealing with a genie.
@gudenau
This is how I imagine the arcane designing new magic.
@rick_777
Genie: "How do you do that thing with your voice?"
Me: "What thing?"
Genie: "That thing where you say a key word like 'must', but it sounds like you said it in all capital letters?"
@solder_on Granted. You're now trapped in the genie's bottle.
I didn't ask for the bottle ;P
@rick_777 This is incredible. I’ve been cackling and gasping for air for the last ~3 minutes.
@rick_777 You might enjoy this story:
https://archiveofourown.org/works/4637439/chapters/10575111
@rick_777 IS IT WHAT?! I MUST KNOW!
For reference:
https://tools.ietf.org/html/rfc2119
(gotta love web specifications.
)