Pinned ping

It's spooky season, and I have made it my goals to be scaring the hoes all month

Pinned ping

UPDATE 

MY DICK AND BALLS ARE WEIRD AND WILDING OUT

Pinned ping

Top surgery gofundme, boosts good 

Hey guys my partner has a gofundme for his top surgery, I asked and he's cool w me posting it here, id really appreciate anything yall could give 💗

gofund.me/f67dd726

Looking submissive and yeetable today king (I pick you up and chuck you a solid 100 yards before fortnite dancing)

USPOL CONTROVERSIAL 

I just shit your pants for you. You're welcome

Alc 

Me: drinks 9 modelos and no water last night while.watching castlevania

Also me: why do I feel like my head is trying to turn itself inside out??? 😮😮😮

Alc 

Liquor store is too far to walk from my partners place but there's a beer store right around the corner

Modelos tonight babey

Alternate universe Marilyn Manson names Charles Monroe

While you were listening to macklemore, I was doing the macklemost

Men's rights? No no I'm a men's tights advocate. I want more dudes in spandex and I want them now

If you cant wear the clown shoes stay outta the circus

Your dad calls me pelosi the way I performatively clap that ass

Maybe instead of telling me to "toich grass" the haters should, instead,, "toich ass"

Minor injury 

I fucked my toe up the other day and it's taking forever to heal and today I made the mistake of wearing my fiancees incredibly not broken in doc martens cause I confused them with my work boots

Folks, it's not a great feeling

Alc, weed 

I am crossfaded and playing xcom. I'm on the third operation slingshot mission and I freaked myself out a bit because I thought I'd accidentally gone way further in the main story than I intended to before I realized this was a dlc side quest 😅

blasting ropes perfectly through the hoop from half court, call that nothing but nut

I hear they're putting Voldo Soulcalibur in samurai gunn 2

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