So CrossOver looks super promising and M1 Macs look really great for when my current machine bites it. Two problems.
First is an inability to run other OS without VM. But this doesn't seem like too much of an issue if I use a separate computer for screwing around with Linux - and dropping Windows entirely thanks to CrossOver.
Other problem is I can't find an M1 laptop that has USB-A support. Very big problem.
Laptops in general are becoming too thin these days. One day you'll not be able to find yours because you stored it sideways and it's too thin for your eyes to perceive.
It makes them scarily flimsy to see, even if they're actually quite robust in practice. I wouldn't be able to take any thin Macbook out of my house without worrying, and the portability is what laptops are for!
(Of course cases exist, but they don't solve the USB-A problem.)