extremely disliking the fact that people selling extremely woo bullshit for hundreds or thousands of dollars are making it hard for me to search for glass or crystal orbs for me to buy just to make my place look rad, instead of chasing away negative 5G demons and balancing my vitals or whatever else these motherfuckers are trying to sell

halfway through making this post, it turned from "I'll dunk on this expensive piece of 'energy' nonsense" to an absolute existential crisis about how I will never write a joke as funny as the world itself. I urge you to read the image descriptions fully for this reason. I am fucking done. defeated. obliterated.


now, don't get me wrong, if crystals help you center yourself and get you where you need to be with yourself and the world, that's great, I absolutely believe your methods are valid and I support you.

I can also show you ebay listings for cool orbs for like ten bucks a piece, don't get conned by these clowns. That's my point.

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