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After exhaustive testing, I've determined that I am composed of 93% bad jokes, 6% really bad jokes, and 1% Foucauldian discourse analysis.

This week's theme: "I can't help you fix your $SOFTWARE problem if you lie to me about the inputs and outputs."

(Fun additional fact: the blossoms smell like cum.)

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Bonus: after doing some research, this tree is not technically considered an invasive species in Michigan, but there are anecdotal reports of it acting the same way it does in the many places that have banned it.

Love to inherit careless plant choices.

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This house came with a lot of small landscaping jobs that need doing.

got a problem with your software? just learn programming, a craft that takes decades to perfect. hope this helps

My least favourite thing about this house is the large pile of yard waste that I inherited from the previous owner.

Being able to have an actual garden this year is nice and all, but it makes me want all of the plants and I can't have all of the plants.

character designers work hard but tumblr artists that want to make every personified evil creature or object in cartoons into a sexy white boy while still looking like the character work harder.

The latest in the rotating cast of pets that are not mine, but currently live with me.

Shopping for light fixtures is a good way to lose any remaining faith in the aesthetic sense of the entire human race.

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