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ME: *acting fairly normal for a change*
MY BRAIN [Victorian English accent, dramatic, as though an actor in a play]: A Crabbe cometh forth from a Clockworke and pincheth a man!

there was some birdsite thread that was like "Black Mirror episodes that would scare medieval folks" and it was solid gold
"A yeoman boileth a Potte, but it shrieketh at himme!"
"A miller draweth Ale from a Bucket, only to discover it more full yet!"
"A ghastly play, performed by Imps upon a flat Glasse"

I came up with some of my own at the time

"A lasse writeth infernal Words of Power upon a magic Tablet; she holdeth no quill nor chisel, but instead abuseth a myriad small stones with the unseemly twitches of her Fingers, and thus granteth the Words their Existence from naught but Light!"

alc 

@diodelass a booke, but of uncountable pages in butte a single binding
@diodelass A twiste of metals, propelled unnaturally fowarde by the rotation of the feets

A hearthe, but contained entirely within a cupboard

@petra A lasse, taken by arcane temptations, forgeth a frightful Sword formed from many steel Pinions; whenupon a certain dreade String is tied upon it, Demons doth leap unseen from its bladetip

alc 

alc 

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