oh, is this some kind of trauma again?
mom, dad, i wanted to let you know i've spent the last 18 months in houston and cape canaveral doing excruciating physical training and, well... i'm an astronaut
oh, honey, we're just heartbroken for you. that's such a hard life. we miss our landbound child and don't know what having an astronaut kid is gonna be like. have you tried base jumping instead? maybe a nice ferris wheel? remember we're grieving too
compliment directed towards reader
all the enbies reading this are way too cute
so many people convinced they are "building the future" are actually just rehashing the present and the past. like every new supposedly planet-scale system that is ASCII only on some level, or the cryptocurrency community who's wildest dreams for a future society still involve money, hierarchy, wealth disparity, centralized control. this isn't progress.
I turn on my PC.
The local wildlife are immediately sterilised by the excessive output from my four exposed nuclear reactors running at a critically risky heat output.
The sound of 10,000 cooling fans deafens the city’s morning traffic as my warehouse of 500 parallel-chained AMD Razer Threadrippers bursts into life, forming the equivalent processing power of 2015 in one room.
Nearby, my cluster of Nvidia 5090 Test Cards begins to warp the local time continuum as they calculate answers man was never meant to know.
Very gently, I open Microsoft Teams.
Instantly, the already deafening noise of fans increases to a murderous wail as they try to keep my equipment at operating temperatures. A nuclear reactors’ fusion catches up with its cooling and explodes destroying the lives of millions. The floor begins to melt away as my processors over clocked ten-fold reach critical mass and descend directly into hell. My Nvidia cluster collapses into a singularity and begins to devour the planet.
Quickly now, I open a text chat, it’s a bit laggy.
The sheer struggle of loading some text destroys the remaining systems. Me and my equipment are deleted from reality by an unknown overseer.
Humanity is not ready for instant messaging