If you tried to run a matrix server in the past and found it incredibly difficult to keep running and updated I need you to know that these days if you install the debian package from matrix's debian repos and follow the instructions over at https://matrix-org.github.io/synapse/latest/setup/installation.html you will get a server that works and is very easy to keep up to date via normal apt mechanisms.
it still requires some know-how and I wouldn't recommend it if you've never run any sort of server before, but it is not the nightmare it used to be.
the mastodon instance at cybre.space is retired
see the end-of-life plan for details: https://cybre.space/~chr/cybre-space-eol
@artemis that's encouraging to hear! I don't have much use for matrix personally but I will support any ally I can find in the war against discord.