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:blobcatsleep: "we'll make our own with blackjack and hookers"

:blobcatreach: "we'll make our own with blåhajs and thigh highs"

He tried to look in the mirror and say something positive.
"You are doing well."
"You are smart."
"You are brave."
"You are kind."
Every time, he felt like a fraud, like a liar. But with time, he began to trust the person in the mirror, who smiled and said:
"You too. I love you."
#MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

I need a t-shirt that says

I'm not ghosting you, I'm just depressed.

As I pull up to the thrift store:

Me: is this where I drop off donations?
Man: Whatcha got?
Me: A TON of men's clothes. New year, new me you could say.

As I drive away, a woman walks out of the building.

Woman: What's all this?
Man: This is a good day.

you either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become a catgirl

the demon with the holy sword 

story idea based on some conversation with @vyr

a demon who was sent to corrupt a little outpost of the church finds a paladin who easily saw through her disguise... only to ask her for help with the fact that she's lesbian/trans/both. so they talk (and do more than talk), and live in this uneasy truce. the demon doesn't try to corrupt things *too* much, and the paladin doesn't reveal who she is.

then, one day, the paladin is gone. the demon asks around in her mortal disguise for what happened, and discovers that the paladin's been discovered by the church, shipped off to be 'corrected'/tried/executed.

but, somehow, her sword was left behind. and the demon takes it up, and its enchantments of light yield to her. and the demon reflects on something the paladin told her: that unlike most of the holy swords, hers was special. it only kills monsters. she draws it across the back of her hand, experimentally. no blood.

but oh, does it draw blood from those that stand between her and her journey to rescue the paladin.

but not the paladin herself, during their confrontation. she'd been broken, twisted against herself, made to believe she was a monster that could only find salvation in destruction. but when the demon brings her sword to her neck, nothing happens. not even the slightest scratch. and the demon implores her to *remember*, to remember what they shared, the love they had. to remember that she's not a monster.

and the impossibly-bright halo shatters, the searing armor fades, and the paladin collapses in to the arms of the demon, of the only person who ever truly knew her.

and together, they find their freedom.

The air was hot and crisp; the smoke made me think of burnt toast.

I concluded this was why folks sometimes call fires 'toasty'.

What was fascinating was how controlled and contained it was. I reached a hand out to pet the domesticated flames - there was an appreciative purr from deep within.

There was a scream and people pulled me away, fussing, then amazed I was not hurt.

I blushed hotly; I'd forgotten I was disguised as a human.

#TootFic #MicroFiction #Writing #TerylsTales #UrbanFantasy

can webshits pull their heads out of their asses for five seconds and realize that computers can run programs other than web browsers

thank you

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apparently there's a piece of software that lets you load modern websites on old computers by acting as a proxy that runs headless chrome and then delivers them to the old browser via images

that's just fucking vnc, but worse

From now on whenever anyone asks what's new in going to say "Bug fixes and stability improvements. You?"

I think adhd is wonderfully named not because of the acronym at all that sucks but because it looks like a keysmash and if that isn't the biggest mood

so there's this questline in No Man's Sky about hatching a biological ship from an egg. it comes out looking like a cross between a whale, a brain, and a thruster, it's adorable in a profoundly weird way, and the best ship type in the game.

i just learned that there's currently an unfixed bug where sometimes the egg hatches a random regular spaceship instead. just, like, a fucking bright red sporty xwing fighter craft plops out of the shell. and i know that's terrible for those affected by the bug but i can't stop laughing at the mental image

my gender is sleepy morning kisses tangled in the sheets with someone you love, soft sunlight streaming through the blinds

The lost pup was tiny. Special attention was taken to make sure she suckled her fill... she didn't have much of an appetite. This worried the pack.

She was easily less than half the size of her adoptive litter; though she growled with the fierceness of a fully grown wolf. This gave them much hope.

It wasn't until the next full moon that the pack realized they had adopted a bobcat kitten.

They still loved her anyway.

#TootFic #MicroFiction #Writing #TerylsTales #Caturday #Fantasy #Lycanthropy

Nothing drives home the dramatic rate limiting of PSN like waiting for game downloads on gigabit.

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