someone in a server I'm in posted a copypasta about a cyberattack happening today where people send you gore and unholy images and I'm like, buddy, it can't be anything I haven't already seen when I was a tween growing up on the mid 2000s internet

feel a large amount of kinship with the kids of the short story "different kinds of darkness" who took turns looking at a fractal that can kill you, just in my and my friends case it was scrolling through the "offended" ed page (do not research)

I think all that stuff sorta influenced my outlook on life. like exposed early that there's REALLY dark shit in the world makes you sit with the question "how do we make a better world?"


the universe is cold and uncaring but human compassion is not

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@SuricrasiaOnline a lot of cosmic horror doesn't work on me, and this is one of the reasons amongst others
@SuricrasiaOnline the other reason is i think cosmic horror kind of assumes a very specific kind of outlook:

- rational in the sense of, everything must be or can be understood
- an assumption that we're "grand" in some regard, bigger than the specks of dust we are, and that's why we're grand (if that makes sense)

i guess my theory is: would a buddhist be scared of cthulu? would william blake?

@libc @SuricrasiaOnline I’m now imagining a story in which William Blake is on a ship that encounters Cthulhu, somehow escapes with no loss of life (though everyone realizes they could have died) and the experience inspires him to write a bunch of poetry about the awful majesty of nature

problem is, to write it you’d need to be a poet as skilled as Blake himself, or else not show any of the results, which would be disappointing

also i’m not sure how to make the awful majesty of dread cthulhu, in this context, meaningfully different from the awful majesty of the atlantic ocean, which has already been sung of at length

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