Pinned ping

imagine going to throw out like an empty bottle of cola or an empty packet of M&Ms and you couldnt because it was a key item

why would you pass up on being able to poop with someone elses butt?

adventure zone amnesty arc episode 1 spoilers 

i went to the kitchen and basically saw my boyfriends alchemy equipment all out, with some weird stuff drying out and their mortar and pestle out and another bowl with strange powder and a bottle of wine on the side? is he trying to hex the moon please advise

could you imagine if aliens landed and got their asses kicked and were like "holy shit WHO SPENDS THAT MUCH ON THEIR MILITARY?!"

homophobia, transphobia, mild and kinda funny 

do you think that aliens landed in like, 100 AD and were like "ffs they're like, a few hundred years away from computers lets bounce" came back a few hundred years later and were VERY dissapointed

if you think about it, krillin was indirectly responsible for defeating freiza, and alpha timeline cell, and people make fun of him but oh man he pulls his fuckin' weight

its weird that there are people who meet me at year 28 of my cinematic universe and just go along with it

"is it a stupid idea to make glazed carrots at 11:15pm" said mord

"no" chris lied

how do animals know not to look at the sun

nsfw, a question for those of you who like penis 

I would like to inform you that I am resigning from my position as Pooper for the Myself, effective Immediately.

Thank you very much for the opportunities for professional and personal development that you have provided me during the last 27 years. I have enjoyed working for Myself and appreciate the support provided me during my tenure with Pooping.

Signed,

Chris.

a joke that could be seen as political 

if there was a zombie apocalypse, statistically there would be some extra somewhere dressed as a zombie, who would end up being a very convincing zombie when they were turned into a zombie

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