I am exceptionally not ready to have to switch into ON mode tomorrow am and Be On for half a month straight but
maybe being forced to is gonna be the thing I need?
this whole place and space is really breaking down but even with all the shit going sideways and things going wrong I'm..
Not only am I not spiraling. I'm actually *very* excited for what's around the corner! Like, enthusiastically hopeful and optimistic?
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The now's pretty shit but I could get used to this delightful anticipation
Feels like I've shed off a crusty skin. Cocoon. Shell. Something. Like everything I was has either been lost or broken or stolen or burned. And the burning remains are only reaching a smoulder now
but the soil's already richer