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workout log 

i need to find hand weights

i don't feel satisfied this time. i'm just drained + wishing i hadn't +, like, vaguely resigned to feeling like this every day

day 4 tomorrow

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workout log day 3 

squats (no weight) 2x15
shitty leg lifts 2x10
low plank knee-to-elbow 1x10 (ow)

i'm weak ass but excited for shit to get easier + to be sexy in 3 months

i wish i had the spoons for cardio too

i love my truck, but sometimes i can't do her justice 😔

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$980 is too much for a timing belt swap on a 2UZ-FE (in a 4Runner), right? i've only called one place so far but that was their quote

i'd try to do it myself but i don't have access to a garage or tools right now, and i feel vvv uncomfortable driving with it 30k mi over the mfr maintenance interval (which is every 100k)

i also do not have $980 (I might in like a month and a half, but that was meant to go into transition-related savings and like, deposit when i move out)

The left/mutual aid/socialist/feminist spheres are in DESPERATE need for surveillance capitalism awareness. We cannot keep using the master's tools to dismantle the master's house. The tools are eventually used against our progress and our existence.

took off the rear optical assembly again bc i missed some q-tip fibers

0.7mm ball bearings are very easy to lose

guess i have a de-clicked aperture ring now

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(with apologies to Codeine)

i feel like string
i feel like nothing

small pieces loosely coupled, or ossify and die 

someone asking for an open source camera-based security "solution," and to me, that's how you fuck up open source: "solutions". you pretend like you'll fix everything for all time for everyone, like you've perfectly encapsulated the ideal problem statement & divined out some perfect outcome.

that's not open source software: only commercial software is that fucking stupid & lacking in humility.

yet another rant,

this is the only pic i took during the process, but i got the lens taken down enough to clean all the fungus i could see, which turned out to be a lot. i'm sure there's more tucked around some corners, though, in the front half of the lens

the problem is that i don't have a spanning wrench to unscrew the front nameplate, so i could only get the rear 2 elements out (see photo). there was enough space to hold open the diaphragm and get fingers/qtips in there, though

i can say with confidence that all the fungus on the outer lens faces of the two optics assemblies is gone, but i think there might be a *tiny* bit more inside the rear assy that i'll never be able to get to

the rear face of the rear group of the front assy was, in fact, etched by the fungus, but not too badly--i have to candle it to see it. optically it seems acceptable now

gonna keep trying to get the front unscrewed but after giving it another sun bath, i think i'll feel ok using it

realistically like. how often will i use a 135mm, anyway

~/- family 

i blocked my parents' numbers, and one of my sisters' numbers

my dad is an irredeemable grifter, my mom's too busy being told she has BPD to get a clue and leave his ass, and my middle sister is in about the same boat as my mom (my youngest is a literal child and beyond my help but i'm not blocking her. we've never talked, but like, just in case?)

god give me the fuckin' strength to stay the line

i also just won an auction for an MD 45/2, which looked pretty dusty but had clearer photos and didn't look fungus-y. if it does it won't be a massive problem, bc it was listed for the price that the 45/2 normally goes for on its own, but came with a Maxxum 7000 body, which is 1) my primary camera and 2) the camera i wanted to give my roommate, bc the 5000i she got from a friend is completely inop. so that's going to her, and if the lens has fungus, it should also be pretty easy to clean (supposedly)

the reason i'm getting a CLA on the SR-T (which i already have a 28/2.8 for), and getting these two lenses, is bc i was planning on loaning my M7000 to my it's-complicated for a class in photography they're taking in the fall (they're a studio arts major). i wanted to still have a reasonably complete camera+system to shoot with, and i never did use the SR-T often enough

rest of stimmy is going towards a new timing belt next week

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bought a lens (MD III 135mm f/3.5, with the 49mm filter thread) and it has a fungus problem. it looks really mild, though, enough that i'm confident none of the elements have been etched and a good sun bath + disassembly will take care of it. it wasn't a bad deal but it wasn't a superb one either, and the fungus definitely wasn't advertised

these things are supposedly easy to disassemble, but i guess we'll see!

the camera i bought it for (my SR-T 201) is headed to Vermont for a CLA rn, but on my NEX w/ an adapter it looks pretty good as long as there aren't especially bright light sources in the frame. if there are then it gets pretty nasty

if your gf's only personality trait is liking Duster: that's not your gf, that's me

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unrelated to last toot:

i know it's disastrously overhyped (dare i say overrated, not in terms of influence but in terms of content), and even Clay Parton himself makes fun of "Duster kids"

but Duster's Stratosphere still puts a smile on my face more often than any other album

if your gf plays a rick bass: that's not your gf. that's my gf now. gimme

new batch of negs. some highlights (pun)

these ones are all 35mm Tri-X, exposed for N+1 but developed for box speed (HC-110 dil. H, 13min, 68F)

the one of the dock really needed an extra stop or two--the shadowed water is basically in Zone 0, which is fine, but the shadowed wood is only barely in Zone I. i like how the rest turned out, though (I deliberately crushed the shadows of the tall one with the water, obvious reasons)

(come to think of it: I'm also wondering if I should switch to bulk-loading, since I can afford a film loader now)

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B&H finally hiked the price of Tri-X from $7 to $8

i made plans last week to order 10 rolls today (bc today is when my stimmy cleared), but the price hike happened literally today, while i wasn't looking

i was thinking about switching to HP5+, bc i knew the price hike was coming and i wanted to see if it would get me more shadow contrast

but now that Tri-X has finally gone up, i'm thinking about just going apeshit and switching cold-turkey to Delta 400

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